Autumn Rain

Chatted online with him tonight..

Felt like old friends again, just bitching daily stuff.

Finally I can't withold what's suppressed within me for days and shared with him how I was feeling about the situation.

His answer, caused my tears to fall like rain.

My decision : To close the door, to walk on, and not look back. March on... till I see the sun.. till I see the rainbow once again.

And..
I got my closure.

Looks like I need to gather the pieces of my fragile heart, mop up the puddle - portions of my heart previously melted by his words - curl into a corner and hide again, to heal, to recover.

Unbelievable.

One after another... passing clouds in my life. Either that, or wolves in sheep clothings. Do I sound like I'm blaming others? I can only blame me.. for not being able to keep my heart locked away. I gave it away too easily. I allow people to touch it and melt it too easily.

Somehow, I am not taking this one well. I don't seem to be able to lift myself up. I think this one hits me deep. Hahaha... unbelievable.

I will be fine. I know I will be.

I have been so naive.

I am now, deeply disappointed.

Reading Chipmunk Prince's blog tonight heap on the heart aches. Even his poem to Princess tonight.. I wish it was for me. sobz. (-_-)

Chipmunk Princes' Poem tonite :

Taurus Princess

Don't cry, don't be sad, my precious one
Even if you trip into sadness,
Look into the truth
Be as you are

Events clouded your smile which I love so
Even if I pray, the flow of time is too fast,
Seems to wash you away too far, and can't go back

Painted by a calm light
The passing months are as if turning nights into dreams
Open your eyes and take a look,
The cherry-blossoms bloom close to you
And brilliantly sways in the rays of lights through the trees

I want to protect you forever but it's alright now
Someone is waiting for your gentle hands,
So lift your head up high

The one who fell in love a long time ago
Do you think they are feeling as one now?

Taurus Princess, fly away strongly
Don't look back,
Crossing the vast ocean
I hope there is always light for you
Because of you,
This life continues eternally

Your voice whispered softly
On the edge of the world
Where we have gotten used to this

Let us shatter the peace which was kept in place by silence
Before the showering of light comes forth
In this fading world, you and I share a bond
There is no need to hesitate or pause

Ah, these memories overflowing in my hands
They'll slowly search for tomorrow so they won't wilt
Princess of mine, fly away strongly
Don't look back,
Crossing the vast horizon
To a brand new day,
Today, tomorrow and for eternity


Sigh... so beautiful, so comforting ...

I wish things can be better for me.

*cough* Hmm... choked on a thought or two :

Things are only as bad as you see it~!
Always look on the bright side.. of life!
Everything's gonna be alright!

OK, will try to see the positive, smile bravely, march on .. when morning comes.

Tweetie will chirp and will flap her wings again .... when morning comes.

At least, I've tasted the sweetness of Summer. Mmm... will remember the wonderful parts. No matter what, that is still a great encounter, a great romance with a twist, unexpected, and something to smile about when I think back on days gone by.


Tonight, I will take my little yellow sinus pill and sleep.