01/01 . Fantastic New Year 2006

At Last!!! 1st January 2006.... Yes, the day I start anew. And 2006 will be a fantastic year for me!!! I could feel it!!!

Was at service earlier... and Pastor's message for this year end is a message of hope and encouragement, and I responded in having my "Manasseh" ... which means "forgetfulness" from the Lord. Yes, I will forget the failures in 2005, the pains and hurts and disappointments in 2005, and will not look back anymore. And yes, for the hurts and pains, I will not nurse it, I will not rehearse it, instead I will release it and let God dispurse it.

And I'm glad I went for service instead of going somewhere alone or just staying home and watch TV (was supposed to meet up with SG & gang per "tradition".. but cancelled). I had Woon on my left, and my dearest brother on my right. When we sang Auld Lang Syne, emotions just overwhelmed me as I felt so blessed, and to be with my treasured friend and family. For this year, I'm glad I've gained Woon back as a friend. We've lost touch over the years and got together again in January when she joined us for service. Many years back, she stood up for me in an awkward and painful situation when nobody else did - not even my then 2 best friends. That has an everlasting impact in my life concerning friendship. There are people you need to pay a price to keep and maintain as friends, while there are those who'll cross your path and stay for a while and move on, and those that you should just let go. I don't have many close friends. But the few which I have --I treasure them, and I know I am true to everyone whom I call a friend, and I hope that will not change. And yes, not everyone will always be a "friend" to me... sometimes, I will recategorise them (down grade) as acquaintances - yes, that's how precise and specific and anal I can be. Critical evaluations. heh-heh...

After service, we dropped by Cold Storage, where I got a bottle of Taylor's Port and another bottle of Yellow Tail Red Wine.. this time I took a "Merlot".... hem-hem-hem... not sure if I'll be able to taste the diff between a Carbanet Sauvignon and a Merlot, or a Shiraz. But hope it'll taste nice and fruity and smooth enough! We went back to Georgie's place and had dinner. Dad came by unexpectedly (to see the baby) and that's really great-- I was feeling bad that he might be spending new year eve alone at home watching TV. George had rented "The Island" DVD, and over some Port, we watched the show. In the midst of it, I felt a sense of warmth in my heart... as I looked around me. Bee, Dad, George, Woon, the baby.... and we're sitting around watching TV. It's a family again! Mum's not here, but she don't really watch TV with us usually. But I really missed the times when we're younger, to have my brother with me as we watched TV and laughed together, comment, or complain or criticize etc. *sob-sob*. Really missed that. I hope the man of my life would enjoy watching TV with me and vice versa. Companionship, I guess.

The movie ended nicely at 11.45pm, and we watched the countdown over TV. It's wonderful to be able to spend new year this way. I am happy and my heart is made glad.

May 2006 be wonderful, may I have a stable well-paid enjoyable job, may I be a better friend and have wonderful true friends, may I be fit and healthy and slimmer (heh), may I be a responsible daughter, may I finally found someone, may I discover me and love me and know that I am most wonderful, may I be brave and strong and determined, may I be matured and emotionally stable and wise, may I be happy most of the time. :)

And on Jan 4th, I will start Salsa class together with Shirl if we managed to get registered!!! Woo hoo!!!! I'm excited to start something new in my life. And I will embrace 2006 positively, with a brand new attitude. No more mooning over the lack of man in my life to make me happy (yah rite~). Happiness is not dependent on another person. No one should be responsible for my happiness. It has to come from me from within. It is a decision. Yes yes yes, its theory right now... but I will attempt at it and make it a principle in my life. I will hold my chin up, I will take steps toward happiness and well-being, I will work at things in my life that can be changed. My name is Vivian, and I am full of life.

Goodbye, 2005! Goodbye pain! Goodbye Tim! Goodbye failures! Goodbye, D-cup! (yah, I wrote this for you, you know who you are). Goodbye FATS and you unwanted 5kg!!! Goodbye depression! Goodbye lonesome and loneliness! I'm not gonna entertain and wallow in you dark clouds anymore!! I'm getting out of the miry clay, I'm walking out into the sunshine, I'm rising up and walk. Goodbye, 2005 and all the sorrow and pain.

But yes, I will bring with me my new found joys, new found friends, and my blog into 2006.

HAPPY 2006, Viv!!!
You're gonna make it!!!
Everything's gonna be alright!!!
woohooooo!!!!!